Starting conversations with strangers is, like everything in life, a matter of practice. There are people who are born with a gift to talk to someone they don’t know. What envy, right? They talk to anyone on any subject and, moreover, always in a correct way and adapted to the situation in which they find themselves. As if they had been doing it all their lives!
- Other people, however, have a hell of a time thinking about what they can talk about, and locating themselves mentally at such times gives them cold sweats. They are afraid of making a mistake or they are lazy to talk to a stranger and think about linking conversations. Do you feel identified with this personality but want to change to the other? Don’t worry! As we have said a few lines above, everything is a matter of practice and we are going to help you.
- Although it sounds typical, the important thing is to be as relaxed as possible because otherwise you will be very noticeable: you will be nervous, uncomfortable, that you are not comfortable… And that will have an impact on the image you are projecting of yourself/ to. Therefore, if you find yourself in a group of people who find it difficult to feel comfortable in these situations, you should prepare some topics of conversation to like strangers and make a good impression. You have doubts? You can take a look at the ones we propose below and write them down so that everything goes smoothly. Let’s see them!
What topics of conversation should I bring up with strangers?
These are the topics that you can sign up for in situations that require bridging awkward silences, creating a good image and/or getting to know the other person better:
The job
An easy resource that can give little or a lot to talk about. This topic may only give you to get to know that person a little more or when asking what they work in, it turns out that you are from the same sector or that you have acquaintances who work in the same field. If this is not the case, but the work he does is interesting to you, take the opportunity to ask questions and find out more about what he does. First of all, you will always learn something. Secondly, that person will appreciate that you ask and want to know more, which will give a good image about you and, finally, it may be the point from which new topics of conversation are born that arise on their own.
Do you have people in common?
If you know this person because someone has introduced you, it is a great resource to talk about the acquaintance you have in common. Why does he or she know you? How did you meet her? It is very likely that if you appreciate the person in common and this acquaintance speaks well of him or her or makes jokes according to the situation, you unconsciously like him or her better. And the other way around will be the same.
Watch out for relevant news!
- A general topic of conversation that usually gives rise to talk when you don’t know much about the other person and you can’t ask much is the daily news. Something that has happened in the next city or an internationally relevant last minute could be good to start a topic: “Have you heard about the fire? The truth is that it had to be horrible…”
- Be careful not to bring up political or religious issues that can lead to discussions or controversies, especially when we do not know the person in front of us well or the thought they have on those issues. Everyone is free to think as they want, but no one is free from the image they project towards another person (and from the image that they forge with prejudices and impressions). When we talk about making a good impression… It’s better not to risk it!
Your interests
- In general, people like to feel heard, whether we are aware of it or not. For this reason, worrying about the interests and hobbies of an acquaintance is a way of making them feel good in our presence, getting to know them a little better and even looking for common ground on which to talk more in depth.
- Almost without wanting to, you will be discovering everything that you are passionate about (imagine how good that would be if we talk about doing business with someone) and, without realizing it, that person will be opening up to tell you about it. For this reason, the image that he will have of us will be very good since we are interested in his life and his tastes.
Ask for advice
- Another thing that makes us feel good is that our opinion is taken into account so that we feel valued. Therefore, if you want to work on the image you give to a person, asking for advice will be a good start for it. Without realizing it, we will be creating the feeling that your opinion or assessment on the subject matters to us, and this will influence the conception you have of us. In addition, a bond of trust will be created that can help a lot to establish a friendship.
- It is important that you think about what you are going to ask for advice. If we are dealing with someone at work, asking for advice on love will not be very successful. Perhaps you should look for something informal but correct, such as a restaurant recommendation, sports or gym advice… Take advantage of what you know about interests and work so that this request goes according to what you have been told.
Introduction is essential when you meet someone
- In addition to the topics of conversation that you can bring up to make a person like you, there is one factor that is essential for a good first impression: the introduction and parting with that person. Although it depends a lot on the type of acquaintance we are dealing with (someone who is shy is not the same as someone who is very outgoing), there are certain common guidelines that we can use regardless of the personality in front of us:
- If you get a chance, don’t let them introduce you, introduce yourself with a phrase like: “Hello, I’m… Enchanted”. This will give you a confidence factor in yourself for taking the initiative, and it will also reflect interest in the image you project.
- Don’t be too effusive or affectionate, but don’t be aloof either. It is the perfect balance for all kinds of people. This way, the open ones will not feel that you are distant and the shy ones will not feel that you are too invasive. This translates into not touching the person and not going overboard with jokes, but from time to time laughing or smiling into their eyes.
- You can add a phrase like: “How are you?”, “How are you?” or “Finally we meet!” It is a sign of interest and desire on your part to meet the other person.
- When it’s time to say goodbye, leave a good taste in your mouth: “I’m glad to have met”, “see you next time and we’ll discuss what we’ve been talking about”, “it’s been a pleasure”…
- It is important that in these situations you are not another person, that is, try to show yourself as you are with certain limits and trying to follow these tips. It is not about you behaving as if you were with your group of friends or old friends, but about not creating a mask or a personality that, in reality, does not exist. If you do this, it will be more and more difficult for you to continue with this personality, you will not be more comfortable and, ultimately, the practice will not do you any good if what you are looking for is to feel more and freer in these situations.