When we talk about jealousy, we usually refer to relationships and for this reason, it is so surprising to detect jealous behavior among friends. But it happens. Jealousy between friends exists and that they are normal does not mean that they are healthy because jealousy is never, at any time or situation, healthy. It is certainly a big step that you have realized that you are jealous of your friend, so it is time to solve this problem.
Why are you jealous of your friend?
- More than once we have wondered where jealousy comes from. It is a harmful and toxic emotion that arises from insecurity, fear of losing that person or low self-esteem. It is also possible that you have a concept of belonging to friendship or love that can do a lot of damage.
- People do not belong to us, be they our children, our parents, our partner or our friends. Each person is free to give their love of their own and to place other people in the position they think is best in their lives. The problem comes when the position you have been given does not match the expectations you had, perhaps you wanted a more important or priority place.
- But affection, like love, cannot be forced. And we cannot force anyone to consider us special in their life. That being said, you can understand why you are jealous of your friend for multiple reasons, either because she has a successful life or because she succeeds socially, or because she has found a great boyfriend. They can also get jealous when she has another best friend that is not you, or when the rest of the group considers her essential and associates with other people with whom you do not have dealings.
How to stop being jealous of your friend
- The fact that you are wondering if it is normal to be jealous of your friend means that you have already done the necessary introspection exercise to realize that something is wrong. !! Congratulations!! Not everyone manages to realize it and instead of acknowledging that they are jealous, they criticize and blame their friend for everything.
- Jealousy makes you feel bad, you will have already realized that. But don’t worry, because the moment you understand how jealousy works, you will stop being so jealous. Jealousy feeds on low self-esteem, so you have to start by loving yourself more, getting to know yourself better and discovering that you are a wonderful person.
- Jealousy also requires a feeling of dependency, something that can be avoided if you protect your independence above all else, if you start to be more autonomous and do things by yourself without having to go hand in hand with your friends. You are a complete person, we always say it when we talk about a couple and it also applies to friendship.
- The fact that you are independent, autonomous and free does not mean that you do not need anyone around you. We all need friends, we all need love, support and a certain social life. What we do not need is the affection of those who do not want to give it to us. And if that friend you’re jealous of doesn’t consider you her best friend, it’s not a loss, it’s a discovery that will make you freer.